Saturday, January 23, 2010

Choosing Career Over Marriage???

Okay, so a few years while I was in graduate school, a good friend of mine accused me of choosing a career over marriage. I was so offended that such a good friend, one who knows my heart, would say such a thing!
I must say, however, this year I have thought about that comment and find myself wondering if there is some truth to that. Now, let me be clear about something...it is not as though I have 10 temple-worthy men down on one knee in front of me and I am saying to them, "I don't think so...I'd rather have a career." And at the end of the day, I have never dated a man that I feel I can really follow...someone that can lead me if I miss a step and that I want to be with for eternity. But I do have a career. And it takes a lot of time. I am not always able to attend FHE or other such activities in my ward because I am working. This, in theory, could prevent me from meeting someone. But I think there is a larger issue at work here. I have not been feeling the ability to socialize lately. I am typically a very social person but have been going though a spell where I just don't feel like I have the energy to meet new people. Maybe this is me choosing a career over marriage, but I sure don't mean for it to. So how does a girl have a career AND find a husband? I certainly do not plan on sitting on my hope chest waiting for someone, but I am wondering how to find the balance between doing something fulfilling while not giving up on the ultimate long-term goal. And I am not sure I have the answer to this...just something I am pondering.

5 comments:

  1. Indeed, women today have a unique position which requires a delicate balancing act between home and world, but I do not think that you are turning down one for the other. Instead, I see it a chance for you to influence others outside the home for awhile and when the right guy comes along, you'll know it and you will take your life's experiences and enrich your family's life from it. Besides, why do people expect that just because a woman is single she should be sitting by the phone waiting for a proposal--we have lives to live!

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  2. Well, I certainly agree. President Hinckley was pretty vocal about women not sitting on their hope chest just waiting, which I really appreciated. I like that you used the word influence...I would LOVE to be a good influence to a worthy man and our sweet, darling children. But as that is not my lot right now, I am excited that my circle of influence can extend to parents, siblings, friends, neighbors, and sometimes strangers. Thanks for the support!

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  3. Um....I never accused you of that, did I?

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  4. Haha...no. You've always been supportive on those things.

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